We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize