i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize