who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
