Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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