Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I think your dad took our porno
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
