haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Gay?
German.
Pity.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
