we have officially lost it.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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