I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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