im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Randomize
