i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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