He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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