I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
