it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Randomize
