he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
