Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
