I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
