Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize