it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
