You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
