People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
