we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
