I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
