Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize