Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize