did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
