5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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