i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
