who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
