I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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