GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
