Kiss
Puke
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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