guys are not supposed to queef...right?
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Randomize
