2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
