I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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