I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
