He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize
