How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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