I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
