belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
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