I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
