I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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