I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
