This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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