HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
