Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
