We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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