I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
