discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
