I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
