remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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